Thoughts on How to Talk to People About God

More and more I’m seeing at the end of the day all we’ve got is our relationship with God and with people.  Not the idea of a relationship, but the reality of a relationship.  Ups and downs, pain and tears, weirdness and wonder, triumph and high fives.   The full package.  There’s no escaping it.

We’re launching a church and all that (if you haven’t heard), and the single best way to get people to come with you and eventually meet Jesus is to personally invite them.

But I know most of us are skittish on jeopardizing our relationships
over a church invitation.  Most of us are scared to open the
conversation.  I’ve been collecting random thoughts on how to overcome
these hurdles.  I hope they help:

  • Pray for people. If you’re scared out of your pants to invite someone to church, tell God about it.  Then ask God to be with you when you chat with them.  Pray that God would move in their heart.  It’s amazing how God actually cares more about people than we do, but we forget that.  So pray for them (and yourself).
  • Try talking about church, not God. We all feel awkward going up to someone and saying "so…what’s the state of your heart when it comes to Jesus?"  I do, and I’m a pastor. So unless you really feel you need to say that, don’t.  Instead, ask someone what they think about church.  Then tell them about your church and what it’s like, and you’ll have more than 3 minutes of stuff to talk about.  Last week, I had a 25 minute conversation with a 22 year old who hates church and whose body piercings had piercings.  Every third word was "dude"…but he and I engaged in a great conversation at length.  I was out of our community, but I believe if he would have lived in our neighbourhood, he would have come.  You just never know.  I’ve had a half dozen very surprising conversations with local people who either will be there or might be there December 2nd and 9th.  If you don’t ask, you’ll never know what might have happened…
  • Admit you’re an idiot and don’t have all the answers.  First of all, they already know you’re an idiot and don’t have your life fully together.  Second, admitting you don’t have the answers takes pressure off both of you.  After all, very few people get ‘informationed’ into heaven.  Most of us get loved there.  A real dialogue with real people based on love goes a long way.  Be real.
  • Talk to them about the kind of church Connexus will be.  We are really gearing Sundays to be (at the highest level we know how to) an environment you can bring your friends to.  A service where people can hear Green Day and Steve Fee music within minutes of each other and messages that engage real life can be a pretty powerful environment for God to meet people in.  Kids ministry kids actually like is another bonus.  And telling people they don’t need to have to carry a 32 pound bible or wear three piece suits or bad sun dresses is still a relief to many (remember, they haven’t been to church in 10 years…if at all…and they stay away due to stereotypes).  The fact that they might actually fit in will still surprise people.
  • Pray some more.  Remember…God loves you more than you love yourself and He loves them more than anyone every will.  He’s just using you as a channel.

I hope you’re investing in people and inviting them now.

You yourself can get a sample of a Connexus service because this weekend we’re open at both campuses at Connexus.
You can go to Barrie or Orillia at 8:30 or 10:00.  It’s our soft launch in both cities — a real service done imperfectly (that’s
kind of what you get every week anyway, isn’t it?).  But we’re actually
open.  Which is amazing!

As we gear up for the December 2nd grand opening in Barrie and the
December 9th, it’s a chance to invite everyone.

Who are you praying for?  When are you going to chat with them?   What fears keep you up at night?  Anyone say yes already that shocked you?


  1. mike helen on August 18, 2010 at 2:05 pm

    hi carey

    i dont know if you have heard of young life, but i heard it all through them so a huge thanks is going to them!!!

    god bless


  2. Carey on August 17, 2010 at 7:51 pm

    Mike…that’s so exciting. We’re cheering for you and praying for you.

    I’ve let our student ministry team know about this. We’ll be in touch. So excited for you Mike. We’re praying for you.

    This truly is the best decision you can make!

  3. mike helen on August 17, 2010 at 6:14 pm

    hey, my name is mike and this week i found that i am nothing without jesus and decided to dedicate my life to him! i am 13 and already want to shout to the world about gods love, wisdom and power!! because i am still young and would still like someone to talk to about this!!

    god bless



  4. Doris Schuster on March 23, 2009 at 1:02 pm

    Hi thailandhoney,
    I don't know how you were led to post a comment to a 2007 blog article in March of 2009? That's really interesting and I'm glad I noticed it! Well, I was led to comment on your comment.

    First of all, I'm really happy that you found God!!! And He is really happy that you found Him too!!! I think that God is going to give you a lot of NEW friends because you have become a NEW person by accepting Jesus. These new friends will help you through all your struggles and God will be right in the centre of everything, helping you in supernatural ways. You can trust Him for everything you need. Also keep praying for your old friends because God hears all your prayers and He will answer. If you get the chance, keep inviting them to church too. One day, they will say "YES" to your invitation.

    Want to talk some more? E-mail me at

  5. thailandhoney on March 20, 2009 at 5:13 am

    ok this is what im going through i actually grown with god and learnt god real good he is a part of me i feel him now i use to dance for years i stopped 7 months ago i go to church alot now i got a real good job doing nails i like it alot very thankful i just have old friends that i try to tell them hey i dont go out to clubs i dont strip i dont drink socialize talking sinful all that i dont do anymore and dont want 2 surround my self with people like that and so now i have no friends cuz they all think im crazy cuz i didnt do the things i use 2 i care 4 my old friends but they wouldnt accept me or god and i hurt cuz wanted the best 4 them!but all i can do is pray hopefully one day theyll wake up.they wont even go to church!i tryed to help them.what should i do i care but noone wont let me help them!!!!my old friends i guess there the past

  6. Carey Nieuwhof on December 6, 2007 at 7:13 am

    Hi Wes….read your comment a few days ago, and just wanted you to know how encouraged i am that you rededicated your life to God. I'm struggling with the idea that your first attempt was a failure, but I can tell you this, neither you nor God is a failure. May you feel His love for you and His pleasure at your decision and commitment to Him.

  7. Wes Wiggins on December 2, 2007 at 9:16 pm

    I have just rededicated my life to god because my first time was a failure. I have just started having urges to talk to everyone about god. I am glad i read this and I have been praying for a lot of people.Good Job on this!! Thanks

  8. Terra Fehrman on November 21, 2007 at 9:40 pm

    This blog was a good reminder for me. I am like Michael Creasor's daughter (How is your Family – Part Two). I am so pumped about what we are doing that I don't care if I sound silly or not cool either. I talk to everyone about it – churched or unchurched. I can't help myself.

    I used The Very Dysfunctional Christmas video at in an e-mail to all local family and friends (even some in Bracebridge and Huntsville). The response has been very good so far. People really like it. Thanks Rich.


  9. Laurie McNair on November 21, 2007 at 10:33 am

    Great tips. Admit that I am an idiot–love it! Of course I am. There is no logical reason for me to be so fired up about something that seems so unrealistic yet I am. How does that work…know idea but through prayer, study and letting go of control (very big issue with me–control freak) I have experienced the amazing power of the holy spirit. What a rush!

    The mystery of God is just that, a mystery. So why do we try to explain it in human terms? We try to put God in a box and then get mad when He doesn't stay there.

    Taking an outsiders’, non-churched, perspective it would appear the church is just a group of people (the Laos) gathering for one hour on a Sunday to listen to a speaker (the ordained minister) talk about a subject (the Word of God) using terminology that most people don’t really understand. Then when the lecture (sermon) is over there is a coffee hour (fellowship). This is when friends get together and catch-up on the week’s happenings (church gossip). What is so enticing about this? What would make a new-comer or seeker want to return? When did church become a social gathering instead of an opportunity to worship God, to learn about the Word of God and then go out into the world to teach others? What happened to the passion? There is a fine line that we are walking but if we are truely following God's will then nothing is impossible. Church should be a place to rediscover God and follow His will whatever that may be. I believe that God is calling us to discover Him and to trust Him.

    If we must define church/ministry it is doing the work of God for God. The body of Christ crosses social, racial, gender and even denominational borders. It is, or should be, about worshiping God and Kingdom building. The people of God have become passive observers to an institution called religion. We have become content to show up and listen each week but we are not impassioned to take it any further. We are in a new time and I can't wait to see what God has planned to shake things up.

    Prayer is the only way! GOD has a MASTER plan…

    Are we ready to take that leap–come to a place where real lives are transformed.

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