CNLP 329: Joseph Sojourner on Navigating the Sexually Charged, Inappropriate Side of Social Media and Finding Your Voice When You’re on Someone Else’s Stage

In this episode, I talk with creative thinker, host and emcee, Joseph Sojourner about his personal journey: His diagnosis of narcolepsy, finding his own voice when he stepped onto some of the largest stages in the world, and how he navigates life as a single man, including how to handle scores of sexually charged DMs that he and others might classify as inappropriate.

Welcome to Episode 329 of the podcastListen and access the show notes below or search for the Carey Nieuwhof Leadership Podcast on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts and listen for free.

Plus, in this episode’s What I’m Thinking About Segment, Carey gives his latest thoughts on the COVID-19 crisis and how to respond as leaders.

Guest Links

Instagram | Twitter | Website | Two Cents

Episode Links

Pro Media Fire

The world is in the midst of a global panic and the church has an opportunity to reach out with hope and love digitally.
I am happy to share that from now to Easter, the Pro Media Fire team has come together to help churches spread peace and hope in these uncertain times. Every day, the Pro Media Fire team will provide FREE social media graphics, videos, and strategies to reach people during this season.
With a social feed of bad news, they will help your church share Great News. Imagine the impact of thousands of churches around the globe sharing Great News from now to Easter that comes through Christ.
Receive free resources and strategies by going to


Joseph Sojourner on Spotify

Dan Pink

CNLP 233: Daniel Pink on the Science Behind Perfect Timing, How Morning People, Night Owls and Everyone Else Can Maximize Productivity and Effectiveness



1. Managing your energy isn’t optional as a communicator

Before burnout, Carey would run like a machine. If he had an 8 AM keynote at a conference, but had a breakout session that ended at 8 PM, he would stay the entire day. He and Sojo have both learned that if you want to be the best communicator you can be, you need to take breaks throughout the day.

Both Sojo and Carey have begun taking naps in between sessions. Carey will often have his team get him back to the hotel for a midday nap, and Sojo will often try to take a 26 minute nap to recharge. When you work long days, you need some form of recharge.

2. There are 3 kinds of people on social media

Social media can be a great tool to reach new people. Sojo has learned that not all social media followers are alike. He has noticed that there are 3 kinds of followers who send you messages on social media. He approaches each of them differently:

  1. People who genuinely want to connect with you on whatever platform you’re on
  2. People who are trying to gauge if they can get you to breach your character
  3. People who are very direct in trying to pull you in a direction you know you don’t need to be

We need to be aware of these 3 categories of people, and engage them appropriately.

Quotes from Episode 329

The church can make you feel broken when you're single. @JosephSojourner Click To Tweet

You can get caught up in your idealism and when it's not matching up with your realistic outcome. @JosephSojourner Click To Tweet

I've learned that you can be polite on the back if you're very clear up front. @JosephSojourner Click To Tweet

A lot of people are processing and overthinking things. I think that they want less thought and they just want you to be you. @JosephSojourner Click To Tweet

You're just taught to be like, hide it, hide your weakness so that you could always appear strong and therefore you'll be safe. @JosephSojourner Click To Tweet

I think when God restores that intimacy, silence with Him is just beautiful. @JosephSojourner Click To Tweet

Silence begins to feel more loud the more aligned you get with Jesus. @JosephSojourner Click To Tweet

You have those insights that, I think, are gifts that silence brings you that noise doesn't. @cnieuwhof Click To Tweet

What you take the time to do can truly impact and change someone else's life. @JosephSojourner Click To Tweet

Read or Download the Transcript for Episode 329

Looking for a key quote? More of a reader?

Read or download a free PDF transcript of this episode here.

Watch Back Episodes of The Podcast on YouTube

Select episodes of this podcast are now on YouTube. Our new YouTube Channel gives you a chance to watch some episodes, not just listen. We’ll add select episodes to YouTube as time goes on.


The world is experiencing a series of unprecedented challenges, and you’re leading in the midst of it all.

I’ve got a brand new online, on-demand course, called How To Lead Through Crisisthat can help you lead your team, your church and yourself through the massive disruption.

The course is the gift from me and my team to you and leaders everywhere. In light of everything that’s going on, we decided to make it available 100% free.

Inside How To Lead Through Crisis, you’ll learn how to:

  • Cultivate a non-anxious presence that inspires confidence and trust.
  • Care for yourself so the crisis doesn’t break you.
  • Master the art of fast-paced, clear decision making.
  • Gather and interpret the most reliable data that will advance your mission
  • Advance digitally to scale past physical barriers and grow your outreach.
  • Lead your team and congregation remotely

While no one has all the answers in a crisis this big, in the course, I share the mindsets, habits, tools and strategies that I believe will help you lead through crisis to get you and the people you lead to a new (and better) future.

You can enroll and get instant access for you and your team here.

Subscribed Yet? 

Subscribe for free and never miss out on wisdom from world-class leaders like Brian Houston, Andy Stanley, Craig Groeschel, Nancy Duarte, Henry Cloud, Patrick Lencioni, Francis Chan, Ann Voskamp, Erwin McManus and many others.

Subscribe using your favorite podcast app via

Apple Podcasts


Google Play



Spread the Word. Leave a Rating and Review

Hopefully, this episode has helped you lead like never before. That’s my goal. If you appreciated it, could you share the love?

The best way to do that is to rate the podcast on Apple Podcasts and leave us a brief review! You can do the same on Stitcher and on TuneIn as well.

Your ratings and reviews help us place the podcast in front of new leaders and listeners. Your feedback also lets me know how I can better serve you.

Thank you for being so awesome.

Next Episode: Sheryl Brady

Sheryl Brady leads a mega church in Dallas and has a large international ministry, but never imagined herself as a leader. Sheryl talks about her unlikely rise into leadership in her early thirties and the struggles it caused her as a mom. She also talks about struggling with her own faith and having to lead in the midst of a personal crisis, and how to discern what opportunities you should take and which ones you should say no to.

Subscribe for free now so you won’t miss Episode 330.

CNLP 329: Joseph Sojourner on Navigating the Sexually Charged, Inappropriate Side of Social Media and Finding Your Voice When You’re on Someone Else’s Stage

1 Comment

  1. CharlesG on March 31, 2020 at 4:39 pm

    Which apps did he use for napping? 🙂

Leave a Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.