Ever wonder why some people are influential, and others, well, aren’t?

Take getting others to buy into your ideas, for example. Some people seem always to be able to win the day with their ideas. Others, not so much.

I get asked all the time by leaders how to get their team members to take their ideas (and their leadership influence) more seriously.

What’s fascinating to me is that the conversation almost always begins from the angle of how to pitch ideas. It’s as though most of us have convinced ourselves that we just need a better argument, point or insight and then our ideas will catch on.

Sometimes that’s the case, but more often than not it’s deeper than that.

It’s easy to think leaders buy (or reject) our ideas. But I’m not sure what’s what really at play most of the time.

At a deeper level, it’s often a question of whether leaders buy you.

As harsh as it sounds, here’s the truth: if a leader doesn’t buy you, they’ll rarely buy your idea.

Leadership, as John Maxwell says, is influence. So the question about whether your ideas or viewpoint catches on quickly becomes a discussion about influence.

Your influence as a leader is never static. It’s either advancing or declining.

If you’re struggling to get your ideas adopted, you’ve likely got an influence issue as much as you have a communication problem.

If you have a strong influence at work, leaders will usually race to embrace or adopt your input. Conversely, if you’re not respected in the workplace, your ideas will likely get ignored no matter how logical or persuasive your ideas seem to you.

So how do you gain influence in the workplace? Here are the 6 biggest factors that cause people to ignore your ideas and influence.

1. You Aren’t Sensational At What You Do

Not surprisingly, there’s a direct connection between competence and influence.

Leaders instinctively develop a habit of listening to their highest performing team members, even if they might initially disagree with their approach on issues.

When I see to leaders who never seem to be able to get their ideas adopted, I often wonder if it’s because their teammates don’t respect them.

There's a direct connection between competence and influence. Click To Tweet

If you want more influence at work, be sensational at what you do.

Your ideas are always attached to you. If people respect and admire you, they’ll tend to respect and admire your initiatives.

2. You Need To Grow Your Character

Being great at what you do is one thing.

But we’ve all met competent people who we don’t like spending time with.

Character impacts your influence as much as competency does.

And long term, it even matters more. Ultimately your character, not your competency, determines your capacity.

Why?

Because character is still the ultimate lid on leadership. Every day, highly competent leaders lose their jobs, their careers and their families because their character imploded.

Your competency will take you only as far as your character can sustain you. So work hard on your character. It’s the last cap on your leadership.

3. You Don’t Cultivate Humility

The only person who likes a know-it-all is the know-it-all himself.

Paradoxically, if you want to cultivate greater influence, make your leadership less about you and more about others and the cause.

Prideful leaders are incredibly reluctant to share the spotlight. After all, you’ve worked so hard and so long, why share this moment with anyone? So if you’re a proud leader, you want the stage as often as it’s available. You want to chair everything and are reluctant to let anyone truly lead or get credit.

But humble leaders willingly push others into the spotlight.

They share credit. They share the stage. And they don’t have to lead everything.

In fact, they intentionally develop others leaders and even replace themselves in many key roles because the mission is more important than they are.

A humble leader rejoices in the success of others. A proud leader resents the success of others.

If you want to overcome envy and insecurity, do what proud people fear doing: push others into the spotlight. It will break the stranglehold of envy in your life.

4. You Don’t Do What You Said You Were Going to Do When You Said You Were Going To Do It

Honestly, if you want more influence starting tomorrow, just do what you said you were going to do when you said you were going to do it.

So few people do this.

Missed deadlines and excuses are the staples of the vast majority of people, including people in leadership positions.

Do you have any idea how many bosses/employers wake up every day to a string of phrases like:

I’m sorry

I didn’t get it done

Sorry, I had a bunch of things come up

Oh, I didn’t think it was that important

I’m so slammed right now

I just forgot

If you simply do what you said you’re going to do when you said you were going to do it, you’re ahead of 98% of the population of planet earth.

Furthermore, people will gain confidence in you.

And confidence, of course, is the basis of trust. If they know they can trust you, they’re far more likely to trust your ideas.

5. You Don’t Initiate

A surprising number of people sit around waiting to be told what to do next.

The best leaders never do that. They see what needs to be done, and they do it.

If you’re not sure whether you have permission, ask.

An occasional “Hey is it all right if I reorganize this entire system?” is better than “I went home early because I couldn’t find anything to do.”

Leaders look for self-starters. Self-motivated people always have more influence than people who sit around waiting for their next assignment.

You likely have more permission than you think.

6. You Don’t Finish

It’s great to start things. It’s another to finish them.

So many projects get started and then get abandoned. You and I can both point to hundreds of blogs and podcasts that started well and died a dozen posts or episodes in, because leaders had a lot of passion to begin but none to finish.

Ditto with projects at work.

So many great new initiatives fail to see daylight not because they were bad ideas, but because team members never finished what they started.

Shipping beats dreaming. Finishing trumps starting. Completing beats planning.

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What Do You See?

These are 6 non-negotiable traits I see in leaders who are increasing their influence.

How about you? What have you seen influential leaders do?

Scroll down and leave a comment!

The 6 Biggest Factors That Cause People To Ignore Your Ideas And Influence

12 Comments

  1. Alexis on December 23, 2020 at 10:07 am

    I can see how these points can be helpful; however, I encourage you to listen to more women share their experiences of not having their ideas taken seriously – or being belittled, then hearing their boss representing the idea as his own in another context.

    • Leah on December 25, 2020 at 2:44 pm

      Unfortunately, this is true. I wish it wasn’t true. I work very hard sometimes bringing ideas to the table. In the meeting I’m told all the reasons it won’t work. I come up with solutions to many of the problems only to find out later that the idea was pitched or adopted by leadership and my name wasn’t even mentioned. Ultimately, taking full credit for the idea themselves. I’ve really struggled figuring out what I can do about it.

  2. ISMC Halifax on December 23, 2020 at 9:02 am

    Another practice of humility is to ask others for their suggestions instead of telling them what to do.

  3. Mike Kubus on December 23, 2020 at 8:48 am

    Great post, Carey! This will help with some self-reflection as we close out 2020 and prepare for 2021. Merry Christmas to you and your family!

  4. Jesus M Ortega on May 1, 2020 at 5:35 am

    I find that a servant leader, a loving leader possesses these traits, but I also see that leadership in my experience, but not in all cases. refuse to ask the hard questions of why some plans and ideas aren’t working. I know that humility and character really does make all the difference.
    Thank you for the post and insight.

    • Carey Nieuwhof on May 1, 2020 at 2:25 pm

      Glad to help!

  5. Joseph Bowman on April 18, 2020 at 7:33 pm

    This is a conversation rarely spoke of in leadership circles! It would be great podcast subject: learning how overcame these obstacles and the data/results that were achieved!

  6. Zack on April 18, 2020 at 11:48 am

    Thanks, Carey. Another factor that I’ve seen to pay dividends is the power of relationships. It falls in line with character and trust. If you build rapport personally with those you are seeking to influence, they are more likely to be open to your influence.

    • Nadya on April 19, 2020 at 12:23 am

      I wish that people would have the nerve to approach leadership (elders) about these things instead of silently struggling and then eventually leaving the church. And I wish the leadership would do hard things and do something about it. A particular leader I know is exactly that know it all, who doesn’t listen to understand and whose character is immature and imbalanced. No one wants to serve a leader who is fake, preoccupied, pushy, guilt trips and talks being people’s backs during meetings. Engagement will shrink, it will be difficult to procure volunteers and eventually many will leave the church if conflict doesn’t arise first.

  7. Pst Ken on April 18, 2020 at 9:41 am

    The content is of great help especially to thanks alot for the efforts and sacrifice

  8. Tim Reimer on April 18, 2020 at 7:57 am

    Good words for a Saturday morning in the middle of a Covid world looking for direction and hope.

  9. Adam Hann on March 13, 2017 at 9:08 pm

    Great post! Working on a session right now for a staff training on this very topic. One trait that I always notice in team members who influence well is that they ask good questions and listen well. Ties back to humility and character I think. Thanks for sharing!

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