Ask More Questions

One of the best things a leader can do is ask questions.

When I started out as a leader, I thought it was my job to have all the answers. I’ve rethought that a lot.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m a leader by nature.  I pretty much have an opinion on everything.  And I form it quickly.

Which is my problem.

If I don’t catch myself, here’s what I do:

• I try to solve their problem.
• I give immediate advice.
• I jump to a conclusion (in the absence of the relevant facts, I’ll infer them).

Now while there are moments where that skill set can be helpful (like during a crisis), and while as a leader you need strong instincts, day to day it can get in the way.

Here’s what it does:

• It’s disempowering.
• It ignores the value of what others could contribute.
• It stunts the leadership potential of the person I’m talking to, because I solved something they could solve (often better) on their own.  The more you deal with a person, the more this is true.

So I’m trying to ask more questions.  Here are ways that questions are helping me out these days:

• Instead of jumping to a conclusion, ask a question. Ever notice that often the conclusions you jump to involve attributing a motives to someone because you lack information, as in “I’ll bet he was late for work because he slept in.”  Whether you say it or not, you’re thinking it.  If you asked a question, you might learn that his car wouldn’t start of his daughter was sick.   And if he did sleep in, what have you lost by waiting to learn that?
• Instead of offering your opinion, ask a question that might help the person see things from a different perspective.  For example, instead of saying “I don’t think that would work.”  Why not ask “Where do you think that will lead long term?”  People own conclusions they reach themselves.

How about you?  Asking more questions these days?  What are you learning?